LOBO PARAMILITARY CHRISTMAS SPECIAL 1 1991 SIMON BISLEY Main Man vs Santa Clause

Description: The Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special" 1 DC comics 1991/1992 Aurifice and Ferryt Thung, unable to provide a material Christmas, are dreading facing the wrath of their ten kids in the morning. A knock at the door reveals a mysterious book on the doorstep called, The Lobo Xmas Sanction, detailing a story that would adequately scare any demanding children straight during the Christmas season. Hoping it is the answer to their fears, the anxious parents begin reading, "Once upon a time. There was this really cool dude." Lobo and Dawg arrive at a drinking establishment to meet with a client. The client turns out to be a highly inebriated Easter Bunny who wants to put a contract hit out on Santa Claus for his perpetual upstaging of lesser holiday icons. Lobo joyously agrees to take the job and departs for the North Pole. He bursts into Santa's workshop guns blazing and begins massacring the elves. Some of the elves attempt to fight back against "the naughtiest one", but they are only armed with pop-guns. After turning the workshop into a bloody tableau, Lobo makes his way to the throne room of Kris "Crusher" Kringle. Santa is not the jolly, smiling old man personified in the traditions however. He is actually a merciless taskmaster armed with razor-sharp shivs and accompanied by a gorilla companion named Kong. Before Lobo executes Santa where he sits, he is coaxed into a fair fight by the bearded bastich. Kringle chooses the weapons and leads 'Bo into the Elf-o-matic Cloning Unit, claiming there is more room to maneuver. The two brawl fiercely, and the fight is as messy as it is brutal. Ultimately, Lobo wins by decapitating Kringle with one of his own shivs. Exploring afterwards, Lobo finds Santa's naughty/nice data-bank and views the resource as an invaluable tool being squandered. He perceives the "nice" as weak, "Victims in the makin'!" Whereas the "naughty" he sees as potential competition. Manufacturing his own presents, he fills up Santa's sleigh with H-bombs and flies across the world, raining them down upon sleeping towns and villages. Thrilled by such a horrifying tale, the Thung's no longer fear being torn apart in the morning but their own irascible offspring, but upon reading the last page - "This book is only good for one read. Gotcha, sucker!" - Ferryt solemnly heads upstairs with his shotgun and murders his sleeping children. Cover GalleryLobo Paramilitary Christmas SpecialFebruary, 1992Executive EditorDick GiordanoCover ArtistsSimon Bisley The Lobo Paramilitary Christmas SpecialWriters Keith GiffenAlan GrantPencilers Simon BisleyInkers Simon BisleyColorists Lovern KindzierskiLetterers Gaspar SaladinoEditors Dan Raspler

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End Time: 2025-02-04T01:57:33.000Z

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